Pete Desrochers Biography

ADR Experience

As stated in his bio, Pete's portfolio of high-profile mediations includes working with the U.S. soldiers in Iraq, Afghanistan and Germany; a firefighters’ labor dispute; a wrongful death suit; several trade agreements between Asian countries; the kidnapping of a child to Japan during a custody battle and the murder of a celebrity. He has worked with numerous city councils when counselors were so badly locked in heated disputes such that bylaws, regulations and policies could no longer be passed. Of the 3,800 + mediations Pete has conducted, about 60% are corporate-related and 40% are family mediations. Pete, and a probate lawyer have developed a training course for mediators and lawyers who want to specialize in wills and estates. He has also developed a well received series of "protocols" for highly volatile or hostile divorces, such that non-compatible parents can still  effectively co-parent their children. Corporately, Pete is the author of the Bluebook of Advanced Negotiations.

Approach

"I've often been criticized by more conservative mediators and mediation organizations for 1) thinking too far out of the proverbial box, 2) being too compassionate with clients, and 3) being too hard on fellow mediators and dispute resolution regulatory bodies. To points 1 and 3 I plead 100% guilty. The art of dispute resolution has been growing and expanding to encompass more situations and more modern types of conflict. We are into AI, we are into online dispute resolution or 'ODR', some jurisdictions are into combining mediation and arbitration (also known as 'Med/Arb' ). Now there is 'Adjudication' which is popular in Great Britain. Europe and Canada. All of these require considerable extra training for dispute resolution professionals...especially mediators. However I'm not convinced that mediators have kept pace in terms of personal development. I push for additional requirements such as at least crisis communication training - or even crisis mediation. I believe Eldercare mediators and Wills & Estates Mediators <em>must</em> be trained in both, in order to properly practice either one. I believe that in corporate mediation, it is totally justified and even necessary to look at all peripheral issues leading to the dispute in question and addressing those matters in detail. Otherwise, we are likely putting band-aids on wounds, rather than actually addressing the cause of the injury.  Again, all of these require extensive additional training. This type of training few are willing to undertake. Lawyers who has taken three to five day mediation training from their local Bar Associations are hardly qualified mediators in my opinion.  Other professionals who take 4o - 50 hour mediation training - even from fully accredited mediation organizations - are hardly qualified mediators inn my opinion. This is just the start; and I liken these individuals to medical interns training to be doctors. The bar for training, ethics and experience has to be raised. As for point #2. I do not think I am too compassionate with individuals or clients. Gentleness is a strength, not a weakness. Only the strongest of people can be gentle. Trying to portray strength is for fools and bullies; and very seldom are these the sort of people looking for true resolution to their disputes. Many get confused with a word we commonly use, but do not really understand. That word is 'empathy'. People still get that word mixed up with sympathy. Sympathy is "a feeling or expression of caring and concern for someone else who is suffering or has has problems that have caused unhappiness". Empathy is entirely different. Phrases like "This is what I would do in his situation" or " I can imagine what she is going through" do not reflect empathy. Empathy is more like "This is what I would do in his situation <span style="text-decoration: underline;">if I thought as he does</span>." Or, "I can imagine what she is going through <span style="text-decoration: underline;">if my pain or emotional triggers were the same as hers.</span>" It takes time, sensitivity, understanding, awareness and (yes) compassion to be empathetic. Empathy is what builds trust in a client, without having that person become dependent upon you. Empathy creates that "safe zone" we mediators try to create for all our clients. Empathy is not sympathy, or weakness, or favoritism. To me, empathy in the true sense encapsulates everything I do and everything I believe in with respect to mediation or any kind of dispute resolution."

Areas of Practice

Additional Services

Languages Spoken

• English (Mother Tongue)
• French (Highly Profficient)
• Spanish (Elementary)

References

• I never reveal references, though I have many.

Liability Insurance

Yes